7 quick getting ready for baby takes

1. Yesterday Claire climbed into my bathroom sink (no small feat) so that she could get her hands on the four binkys that I'd been hiding/collecting in the corner of my vanity. Chris found her in the sink, clutching the binkys, with a look on her face that said, "What? You're acting like something is odd." Yeah. I've been trying to wean her off of the binky for weeks, half-heartedly.  I've not been very consistent because mostly I don't actually care. In the past week though it's become a major behavior issue and she's using them as leverage for things that she wants and pitching fits over them and intentionally losing them in her bed so she can come out and request help to find them and...I'm so done with that crap.

I took them all away and the first night she whined a bit for an hour and the second night when she asked for one Chris said no and she didn't say anything else.  If it turns out to be this simple, I'll be amazed.

2. I went to see my midwife yesterday and things are good. I am actually DOWN a pound in the last two weeks, which makes absolutely no sense as I have eaten at least four pints (perhaps six, I can't actually remember) of Chocolate Peanut Butter Haagen Dazs in that time. My uterus also measures 33 weeks (I'm 31). I have been comparing photos and I feel like I AM bigger at this point than I was with Claire so that made me feel a bit validated.  We're taking the L&D tour next week (different facility than where I delivered Claire) and my midwife was very specific that we should absolutely, positively NOT PAY for the extra fancy suites (which we weren't going to) but she was like, "They would kill me if they knew I was telling you that, but just DO NOT. So not worth it."  Ha, ha, ha. She also said that earlier that afternoon she delivered a 10 pound, 3 ounce baby and WHOA don't say that because it totally freaks me out with my measuring-ahead belly.

3.  But speaking of the measuring-ahead belly, I am actually at the point where I am DAYDREAMING about labor. Like, "Oh wow, I would SO LOVE to go ahead and give birth because then I won't be pregnant any more and I won't feel like this!" Obviously, I don't want to go into labor NOW, because _____ is not finished baking yet, but the fact that I'm looking forward to labor is kind of weird, right? I'm anticipating it like one might anticipate a vacation. (You know, a vacation where you bleed a lot and then don't get to sleep for 6 months. Sounds fun, right?)

4. I'm planning on a medication free labor because the two epidurals I had last time didn't exactly work and I WAS able to go for 11 hours without pain relief while on steadily increasing doses of Pitocin (to my great surprise), so I have this idea in my head that not only can I do it, I can maybe rock it out and do it awesome.  I might be totally wrong, but this is my mindest. It is kind of easy to get this mindset (medication free) when you know an epidural isn't a reliable option for you. I feel more like I'm backed into a corner than making an informed choice though. (I know epidurals have their issues but man, was it nice to just turn off the pain for that 20 minutes when it worked.) I wish it WAS a good option for me because I am the kind of person that simply enjoys having options available rather than none at all. (I don't like those loopy other drugs they can give you. I want to be alert.)

5. Can we talk about how much easier it is to prep for a second baby? I don't mean in material goods, but the mindset is just less stressy.  I once read an article about people with one child that are afraid to have two, for reasons of overly complicating their lives.  The article was saying that they don't actually realize they already took the great majority of the emotional, fiscal, time-management and relationship hit with the first one.  That is, the second child will not change your life NEARLY as much as the first, so the "cost" is far less (and, in fact, the article was making that point that the benefit/joy far outweighs the "cost" since you've already sunk most of it into the first).  It was a really interesting article and I wish I could find it for you but it was a couple of years ago. (Was in either WSJ or NYT though, if anyone has better Google skills than I do.)

Anyway, I think that's so true because not only do Chris and I feel like we know what's coming, we feel like we know how to handle it and how it impacts other parts of our lives. I think we're rather good at juggling All Of The Things That Have To Be Done And Taken Care Of and I've been thinking a lot lately about how nice it is to have a good idea of what we're getting into.  It's not that I think we're going to be really good at two or that it will be easy (HA HA), it's just that I think being aware of our individual strengths and weaknesses as parents (rather than having no clue and learning it all day-to-day) will play to our advantage the second time around.

6. Your thoughts on cloth diapering were OUTSTANDING. Really, THANK YOU!  I am beyond impressed with the time you took to share so much with me.  We are mulling a few things over but I think we're definitely going to cloth diaper, I just have to figure out what to buy and how to set it all up. I promise I will update you when purchases have been made.

7. They gave me the form to request her birth certificate yesterday. THIS SHIT IS GETTING REAL.

Comments

[Elsha]

Good luck with going medication free! I'm sure you can rock it! Hopefully you won't need pitocin this time around.

Also, I agree, prepping for a second baby is MUCH easier than a for first. And, in my opinion, having two is easier than having one. That may just be because my expectations with two were so much lower (if I make it through the day that's a win!) Now that they're a little older though I really think that. So much easier for them to play together than for me to have to be entertaining one all the time. (Just so you know, by "a little older" I mean almost 3 and 1 year old.)

[Holly]

Oh, you can totally do med-free labor. I did :)

And, they're trying to get Clara to give up the pacifier at school during naps.... she's not having it. I'm trying to restrict it to just crib-use at home, but good grief. It's going to be a challenge to break her of it, I'm sure.

Maybe Claire can give her pacifiers to baby sister?

[HereWeGoAJen]

Is it weird that I am ridiculously excited that you are going to cloth diaper? Yes, it is weird. (And ha, the time I took, I had to sit on my hands not to write more, I can go on for HOURS.)

A vacation where room service brings you food...

[DCZia]

You can totally do a med-free labor, especially with labor support from your midwife. It's all about your mindset. It really is. Your brain can totally do Jedi Mind Tricks on your uterus/cervix etc., so the more relaxed and positive and empowered you are, the better. Are you going to use a doula? I had one, and she was AMAZING. Also, for inspiring birth stories, Ina May Gaskin's Guide to Childbirth. Your body can totally do this - see, again Jedi Mind Tricks. ;-)

[Susan Freel]

Ethan presented his cousin with all his binky's, and that was the end of it. What a generous little boy he was!

[Sarah in Ottawa]

Hooray! You're going with cloth! And you will ROCK a med-free birth. I did both med free with midwives, but my first one went on FOREVER. Number two (wherein I was measuring ahead)? Labour was less than 6 hours from 1st contraction to delivery of placenta. You can do ANYTHING for a finite period of time, and this period of time will be shorter than the last one.

Dave and I just had a conversation about having one child or going from one to two being more challenging. He said the first. I am torn. I find that I get so little done with 2 right now. It's comical how little I get done in a day, and she's already 6 months old. Maybe it'll get easier when they're older but right now, washing the diapers and emptying the dishwasher are milestones!

[Molly]

I have two and I find it to be insane. Not just harder than one, but harder than one plus one equalling two. Exponentially harder. Maybe it was because I had two under two, no daycare, and that meant up all night, then up all day, then up all night, ad infinitum until you die. Now I have them trained to nap at the same time and it's better. Then add sibling rivalry and adjustment for child number one. Now I look back and realize how easy one actually was. Some friends and I have decided that in general N-1 is always easier....

[Molly]

ps I wanted to add- with my first baby I had an epidural, with the second I didn't (not by choice, labor progressed too fast). While I enjoyed my first labor FAR more (less pain, more relaxed), I have to admit, the drug-free labor, though scream my head off painful, was at the end a mind-blowing experience, empowering, and the highest high I have ever felt.

[Mel]

I think the fear of not knowing what it's like with a baby being gone is so helpful. I just didn't know what AT ALL to expect last time, with everything. Labor, birth, newborn, nursing, motherhood.... I think having the power of knowing that you survived it all once is SO awesome. Makes me more excited about the new person this time and less worried about the whole experience.